10 Fun Facts
1- You can’t wash your eyes with soap.
2- You can’t count your hairs.
3- You can’t breathe through your nose, with your tongue out.
4- You just tried No.3.
6- When you did No.3 you realized it’s possible only you look like a dog.
7- You’re smiling right now because you’re fooled.
8- You skipped No. 5.
9- You just checked to see if there’s No. 5
10- Share this with your friends to have some fun too. 🙂
Those who don’t like me, aren’t like me. As its highly unlikely they’ll ever be like me to like me. Which I personally don’t care if this is more than highly likely.
My father was never proud of me.
One day he asked me, “How old are you.”
I said, “I’m five.”
He said, “When I was your age I was six.”
Sometimes all you need is $500 million dollars.
You can figure out how bad a person you are by how soon after September 11th you masturbated, like how long you waited… and for me it was between the two buildings going down… I had to do it, otherwise they’d win.
When you fall asleep tonight, I’m gonna fart in your face.
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.